Well the leaves on some of the trees around here are tinged with death, so brace yourselves and all that. The sun is rising later in the morning, and I can feel change in the air. We are all well and truly back at work and school and “Summer” is over. Except technically it’s not, so I’ll thank those leaves to hold on for a bit longer.
Summer was glorious. Beach holidays and general lazing about were just exactly what we needed. By we I mean I. We did a “day out/day in” last two weeks of the holidays, which saw us climbing Hanging Rock and making skirts out of paper, among other things. The days in between was a tsunami of Baby Alive accoutrements across three levels of the house. But I can say one thing about these girls, they play amazingly together. From sunup til sundown they are in their own little world, oblivious to anything but the constant supply of snacks. Which often end up in the dolls’ mouths.
But yes, school and four-year-old kindergarten has begun, which left me having a quiet cry in shop aisles and post offices across the land every now and then because shit’s going too fast. I have plenty of work to occupy the quiet hours but everyone’s growing up and oh that reminds me, I need to buy more tissues. As all mothers feel at some point, I wonder if I spent as much time with them as I could have. Working from home was brilliant, but I did work. I just hope I didn’t work too much. I’m sure when they’re teenagers they’ll tell me. I think I balanced it pretty well, but what’s logic when there’s guilt to be had?!
I’m really looking forward to this year, I have the feeling that anything could happen. If only I could figure out what I wanted! I’m having now to think seriously about what I want to be when I grow up, and how I can get there from here. While it can’t stay this way forever, I’m really quite content at the moment. Please remind me of that at 3am when I have several existential crises one after the other.
Did you have a good summer? Was back to school crazy for you? Did you have a little cry in the pantry? Do you also have a weird smell in the house but you don’t know where it’s coming from? Your sympathies while I investigate will be welcome.
Glad you had a great summer. We have been busy looking at daycare’s and in home childcare (which I just can’t bring myself to put her in) which is making the fact that Im going back to work this year very real. Part of me just wants to be back and the other part wants to stay with her at home forever. Hope your smell was nothing too sinister!
I reckon I feel this way every year. It goes too fast. Did I do enough? Will they remember if I did such and such or think I worked too much?
Girl, you can’t control the things that they will remember. Maddie comes out with the weirdest shit that she remembers fondly from being a kid. Like the time I made a cubby out of an industrial sized scanner box to look like our house, or the time I broke my toe moving their beds around cause they wanted a change, or the time I got nit solution in her eye and she got to ride in an ambulance on the day we brought Boo home from hospital (bitch WONT let me live that one down). Just enjoy it all. You are an awesome mum and those girls are amazing, living an brilliant life.
Love your face off, as always.
Oh, maybe I have a heart of stone but I have never cried in the pantry. No, that’s a lie. I frequently cry in the pantry because WHERE IS CHOCOLATE? IS THERE REALLY NO CHOCOLATE? IS THIS HOUSE COMPLETELY CHOCOLATELESS? WHY DOES GOD HATE ME? But in relation to a quiet house with no little persons to bust me hiding in the pantry, no, no tears. Every now and then I freak out about how fast time is going and guilt myself into oblivion about how much of their childhoods I spent hiding in the pantry, but mostly when I drop their adorable little asses off at school/kinder, I am a cloud of dust that they can only wave mournfully at.
Maybe it will be different when I send the last one off to school next year….. *hold me* Nah, I still have 3 seasons of Gossip Girl left to watch. I’m good.
In other news, if you had another baby, you would have less sads and you could totally nickname this one Puffy. RIght?