Much has been made recently of the lack of chat on some blogs, and the need to always be useful in every post forever, lest we waste our readers’ time.
Last week I admitted I had the worst case of writers constipation the world had ever seen, and my blog suffered for it. When I couldn’t just chat, and was too tired to be useful, my brain shut up shop and I’ve been straggling about ever since.
But it seemed to spark a discussion among other bloggers who felt the pressure to be “useful” all the time in order to succeed – we’ve been told it’s the best way to grow your blog. And it is – providing value is of huge importance if you’re in this like a business. But so is being personal and real and sometimes even vulnerable. If it’s a hobby, a creative outlet – anything goes!
It’s kind of like the blogosphere had swung so far into how-to territory that people forgot that a bit of a friendly waffle was still very much wanted.
It can be difficult to navigate the line of what you want to write Vs what your readers want to hear. I always say you do you, and your people will find you. But when you gauge the reactions to your posts and they are confusing (Facebook doesn’t help – you write something and 002% of your audience actually even sees it and 0000001% “like” it or click through to read, you can assume nobody’s interested in what you’ve got to say and then you try to figure out what your readers do want, then you go back to the “be useful” mantra and all of a sudden you’ve got yourself nowhere), then you’re caught, again, between what you want to write and what your audience want to spend their valuable time reading.
I forgot that the thing I love the most on blogs is the chatty life stories. I forgot that maybe people wanted to read mine. Writer’s block and my day job, which is … dun dun dunnnnn…. teaching people how to blog and make money from it… and high unsubscribe rates and low Facebook engagement made me think that my semi-useful-mostly-me-writing-jokes-on-the-internet wasn’t really cutting the mustard any more. I was still talking about mustard, but most folk were just scrolling on by.
I love useful blogs. I have a Bloglovin’ reader full of them. I also love the “documenting my daily life” blogs and I used to eagerly check in on them, watching their world turn as I sat with a cup of tea. I would read anything they wrote because I was invested in them… there was even that day I read every word of a post that The Pioneer Woman wrote that was nothing but her detailing what she found on the floor when she swept it after a week. No shit, every word. And I still remember it, six years later.
So there’s been a sigh of relief among some of us who have felt like maybe they’re allowed to chat again, and a call for others to do the same. You can read about their own struggles and realisations here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here and here. Yeah… that’s a lot! A lot who’ve remembered that perhaps the “uselessness” of a conversation or story is useful after all. And that they’re often the funnest things to write.
When my brain stopped working, I also stopped reading blogs, and it’s been like catching up with old friends lately as I’ve poked about to see what they’ve been doing since I’ve been gone. The best part is that the people who chat have been doing just that, day in day out, making a lot of people very, very happy.
There are so many blogs I love for the peek into their daily lives (some have stopped blogging, but I do love a stroll through their archives):
So if you love a blog, go read it. If you’re a blogger, remember what made you love it so. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned this week, no blogger is ever “too big” to bother leaving a comment. I raise my mug of tea to you all!
Lisa Barton-Collins says
I LOVED that Pioneer Woman post on her dirty floor! I was astonished that someone’s flor could be that dirty, and yet so cool. xx
Stacey says
She has a knack for those kinds of photos! Mine really do just look like a dirty floor haha
Mrs Woog says
Thanks for including me Veggie! And this post is now my new Blog Roll xxx
Stacey says
I’ve missed these blogs so, so much.
Annette says
Chat is back baby!
I love it. I love the conversation it has generated. Let’s chat!
It’s good to go back to basics isn’t it?
And I want to read that Pioneer Woman floor post, stat!!
Stacey says
I think a lot of people felt relieved about their own dirty floors, haha
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
I pop by even when you havent been writing to make sure that I haven’t missed anything or to find a recipe that I’ve used before. I love reading about your life with your two little ones, as I was on my own journey with two little ones. Thanks for the awesome list of bloggers – I’m keen to check out those who I don’t already follow.
Stacey says
Some of them I started reading when I first ever started blogging – even before! And I still love them to this day. Dipping in and out of their lives as mine goes on. Says a lot about stories.
Pinky Poinker says
Thank you for including little old me, gorgeous lady. I’m looking forward to reading others on that list.
Stacey says
I like your chat and I cannot lie x
BabyMacBeth says
I loved seeing all the “useless” blogging posts last week but I was all like….um, that’s what I’ve been doing the entire time. Usless is my speciality! Thanks for adding me on here lady cakes x
Stacey says
haha and then you go and teach people how to make cakes and useful stuff. You are my favourite blend of waffle and knowledge <3
Helen K says
Thanks for starting the whole ‘useless blogging’ (now chatty blogs) focus again, Stacey – it was great to feel a little freer again (and the connecting was great too, thanks Annette!). I appreciate being included in the list of ‘useless’ bloggers, too! On the flip side of feeling like you have to write a useful blog, it’s also great to be able to read, without feeling ‘so now I’ve got some work to do, putting all this usefulness into action’, isn’t it? – instead, just connecting (which is probably what we really want, anyway) Thanks to your blog roll, I’ve got a whole lot more to read again!
Stacey says
Yes I didn’t think of it like that! And some blogs I put off reading because I know I have to engage my brain to take in what they’re saying. That’s such a good point. I love reading a post and just being content with that. Connecting is the best bit! The more I meet people, the more I love this biz.
Also how good is the freedom! Write whatever we like! yay!
Rachel says
Hi Stacey,
Yours is one of the blogs I love! Usefulness can get f&@&ed, please be chatty again!
Stacey says
OK IF YOU INSIST!
Maxabella says
It was like a weight had been lifted for me. I’m so ‘useful’ in my day job that I forgot the same did not need to apply to my whole life and blog. Cheers to the chat. I’ve always loved it very much indeed. x
Stacey says
How good did it feel to cast that weight aside! there is a time for levity and usefulness, and there is a time for nonsense and fun x
Kez @Awesomely Unprepared says
I love this movement (is it a movement?) and I feel like it’s come along at just the right time for me. I am a completely useless blogger 90% of the time so I think I needed the validation haha.
Also, this also brought me to your blog for the very first time so I think it’s working! xx
Stacey says
Hooray! Welcome! let’s be chatty and not helpful together 🙂
Kate says
I’ve only started blogging in the last year or so, but I know what you mean about the perceived need to be useful, even when you aren’t using your blog as a money making venture. It’s also interesting because as a reader, mostly of cooking blogs, I always come for the chat (often not even reading the recipe) but I’m hesitant to chat myself because I tend to think, “oh, who want to read all this blather” even as I’m reading everyone else’s.
I really appreciate the note about commenting on the “big bloggers’” posts too – or any bloggers, really – I often feel like I’ve come late to the party and am just hanging at the edges, hesitant to dive in.
Stacey says
Isn’t it strange, that we love to read the chat but are hesitant to chat ourselves in case we’re wasting everyone’s time? I never feel like my time’s been wasted reading a chatty blog post, in fact quite the opposite! So it is time I blew that off and tried to get my writing mojo back.
I hope you come to love the blogosphere, it really is a wonderful place, despite feeling a bit behind. I still feel like that! but once you find your people, you’re set <3
Dr Sash @From the Left Field says
Chatty is gooood. Chatty is useful. Chatty is the bones of all this stuff. Fab list lady. Keep on chattin’.
Stacey says
pass the wine and I can keep it up
Sammie @ The Annoyed Thyroid says
I think I have perfected the art of useless in the technical sense. I don’t read blogs to learn stuff, I go to hang out and connect and while some blogsperts might say that is useless, for me it is useful. It fills my cup – the best thing about blogging isn’t about learning something new, it’s about chewing the fat and hanging out with your friends (even if they are all in the computer.)
Stacey says
yes, blogging is so many different things to different people. I go for chat, recipes, crochet patterns, looking at people’s amazing farmy pictures, so I know that my readers all come for something different. I think it was trying to figure out what that was that was doing my head in. So now I will write until it all comes back to me <3
Sarah @sarahdipity says
Stacey, you absolutely made my day last week when you stopped by my lil ‘ol blog and left a comment. Thankyou for sparking such an important and interesting conversation in the blogosphere; I think it has really hit home with a lot of us who just want to get back to writing and connecting and loving the shit out of blogging!
Stacey says
Oh you are so welcome! Reading blogs is half the fun, I can’t believe I stopped. My poor brain. It still needs a holiday, haha. I also love that the chat has been brought back x
Nikki Parkinson says
I miss our over-the-fence chats … and that kind of spread … and long hair (actually don’t miss that bit) x
Stacey says
ha you looked amazing in it! you can do anything with your hair.
Vicki @ Knocked Up & Abroad says
I thank you for bringing awareness back to the chatty, nothing in particular type of post. The type that I do most of the time. I have a post coming about it later this week actually. I had found I was not blogging very much at all because I started to feel like I had very little to offer because I haven’t had time to write ‘how to’ type posts and I started to doubt if people really wanted to hear my stories which didn’t necessarily have anything educational or witty about them. Just my home truths. But now I have been reminded of their value, so truly, thank you. And ta for the list of blogs to check out. I know I’m going to totally get engrossed amongst them x
Stacey says
Seems like we were living parallel lives! Enjoy the blog list, they’ve been some of the best computer friends a girl could have.
Reannon says
How funny that by talking about not being able to blog & feeling useless you’ve become SO useful for other bloggers! You opened the floodgates & made bloggers remember that not all blog readers want useful posts. Most of us, the ones who’ve been reading & commenting on blogs for a very long, really just come to chat. As you know I am Chatty McChatson, chatting is what I do! It’s lovely to learn new things but we can learn just as much by reading about someone’s day, their parenting triumphs & fails, what they’ve been reading, cooking & making. Keep talking lady x
Stacey says
It’s so funny because I’m not a chatter, and I think I stopped commenting because I hate typing on my phone and always thought I would do it when I got to a computer – but I rarely read blogs on my computer! And then everything all dried up and went away. I’m making more of an effort to be a chatter and a phone chatter at that! just don’t ever, you know, call me… #hatetalkingonthephone
Druime says
The Chat is On it seems ………… Love your blog roll.
Stacey says
It’s an extensively curated one, eight years in the making 🙂
Rachael McIntosh says
Yay for random useless conversation. Vive le useless revolution!Thank you for loving my pointless ramblings. I love yours too x
Stacey says
your pointless ramblings are funny so you get the highly sought after (ahem) veggie mama tick of approval
Tina Lacy says
I love your chatty posts, hearing about what you have been doing, how you navigate life and being a parent. You are one of my positive role models (in a non creepy I only know you over the internet kind of way)
Stacey says
Ha I know what you mean. Thank you, it’s been a hundred million per cent awesome to always have you here x
Renee Wilson says
I’m loving this chatty movement sick. It’s been so refreshing to hear so many bloggers have been feeling exactly the same way as I have. Thank you for the shout out and thanks for the great list of chatty blogs. There’s a few there that I don’t know. I’ll have to check them out.
Stacey says
I’m severely concerned that now I’m back reading blogs my house will be filthier than ever!
Miss Chardy says
Hi Stacey, thanks so much for including me in such a fabulous line up of bloggers, I feel very honoured. And I agree – I love the chatty blogs, the ones where people keep it real – like Baby Mac (the first blog I ever read). Life can get very lonely out here at bum truck nowhere so reading chatty blogs really does help keep me sane. Lets keep chatting. xxx
Stacey says
Yes! Lets! I love having a peek into people’s lives that are super different to mine, it’s like reality TV but with less overdone makeup and more tractors!
Nicole says
You totes inspired me to get chatty too!
My blog was always meant to be like a journal, not a how to manual.
Thanks Stacey for the inspo!
Xoxoxoxo
Stacey says
yes! I love that! chat away, I think we’re done with the how tos for now x
Lara at This Charming Mum says
Thanks for the link and especially for kicking off this discussion! I’ve really enjoyed the comeback of the chatty post and I’m now off to check out the dirty floor. Maybe that’s the new genre I need to embrace? I have plenty of pics to share!
Stacey says
Haha I’ve never taken a picture but mine would be 99% toast crumbs, 1% LEGO
kelley @ magnetoboldtoo says
I don’t know if I would call me ‘chatty’ more ‘complainy’ or ‘fucking sweary’ but I would read anything you write. Cause you are fabbo.
And I am totes writing this from my phone THAT IS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU. My GOD.
xx
Stacey says
HOLY SHIT I don’t even do that. I feel hashtag blessed.
love you long time x